friends

I'm leaving for school in two days!

These last few weeks, I've been hanging out with my friends from high school and church and such. And it's been quite hectic if I do say so myself. I guess I didn't realize how many friends and how much support I had. I'm not necessarily "popular' in any way.. It's just that when I was in elementary and middle school, I struggled a lot with my friends and many times felt very alone and lonely. But through high school, I was able to make so many great friendships. I'm so grateful for all of the people that have supported me throughout the years and the only thing that really makes me sad about leaving my home town is the support network that I have here. Especially my church friends that I recently have been spending a lot of time with. But in two days; I will be making new friends and new support networks. It's scary, but I'm looking forward to this new beginning 

^ bye bye until next time 

am I ready for this?

Hello my unseen audience, how are you today? 

In exactly three weeks, I will start my classes at the University of California, Los Angeles; otherwise known as "UCLA". One year ago, I would have never imagined that I would be studying Civil Engineering at UCLA.. In September of my senior year, I still didn't know what I wanted to study.. Or where I wanted to go (UCLA was actually at the bottom of my list.. ) I still am unsure of what I want to study or exactly how I want to spend these next few years. I think that's why I'm slightly terrified for October 2nd. Everyone around me seems so passionate and ready for the next few years. And I'm just this small little Asian girl floating around. 

Through my school years, I always needed some sort of plan to help reassure myself that everything was going to turn out fine. But I think that I've been slowly realizing that sometimes you don't need a plan and it'll all be fine. You'll look bad and think "What was I so worried about? It was all under control."

So am I ready for UCLA? Maybe; maybe not. But I think it'll all turn alright in the end..

^ bye bye until next time

wondering where i'll be

Here I am, sitting on a random bench at UC Davis... And wondering, "Am I going to be going school here?..." I recently applied to eight schools - two Cal States, four UCs, one private, and one out of state.. They are all so different, it's impossible to tell what my lifestyle is going to be in a year. The future is a strange and scary place - I'm honestly terrified of what is to come...

 I'm going to write a letter to my future self, just for fun... and edit this post in the future to see where I ended up:

Dear the twenty year old me,
How are you? What have you been doing for the last three years? I feel like I'm just wandering around, unsure of what is to come. I hope that your life is a bit more secure than now.. Is college great? Stressful? boring? I hope it's fun - make sure you keep learning and not let your curiosity die :) I bet this letter and blog sounds immature now that you're three years older. Don't be scared to make mistakes twenty year old me! Did you ever switch your major?... How do you feel after reading this letter to yourself? I bet it's really weird... Have a nice day ~
- the seventeen year old me

^ bye bye until next time